Monday 4 August 2008

Sam: Oh shit I'm Old

Todgers, I’m wondering if you have had the ‘Oh shit I’m old’ moment yet.

Mine came just the other night. I was out with one of my old clubbing buddies celebrating his 30th birthday. The first sign of trouble was that I started involuntarily wincing as my friend constantly mentioned his 30th birthday and wife to every new person he met - who were all clearly just out of school.


Next was a strange moment on the dance floor, with myself in a shirt (quite stylish I thought) surrounded by girls who were dressed just like Amy Winehouse but younger and without the bleeding toes. Looking at the guys there I started to feel distinctly out of place since I wasn’t wearing a t-shirt emblazoned with skulls and cross bones and my hair wasn’t long and stylishly moussed.

Then there were my fellow pals mumbling to each other ‘I wish the music was a bit more funky’ (translation, I wish they would play music which is now 5 years out of fashion).

It was awful, I felt a bit like a dirty old man hanging out at a school gate. Not what you want on a night out where I was supposed to be out with my mates, having a good dance and celebrating his birthday. I’d like to blame him and his choice of venue – but no solace there. This club was where we all used to end up on Sunday morning at the end of our very big weekends. And I’m sure there was more funky house music then.

8 comments:

Unknown said...

That "dirty old man" moment is a horrible one. My problem is I'm 38 with an 18-month-old son. In my dirt-poor town most 38-year-olds are grandparents, with 20-year-old children. I'm supposed to be attracted to the parents, but it's their grown children who are the attractive ones.

my sun sets to rise again said...

Never go back to the clubs of your youth. Ever.

I'm 25 and going back to the club we used to frequent when we were young (15 ~cough~) makes me feel about three times that. Because it's still populated by 15 year olds.

Anonymous said...

It would have been a lot worse if you had been wearing a skull & bones shirt and moussed your hair...

boohoo said...

I'm only 25 and I always get the "oh crap I'm way too old" feeling. 'Though I've never felt like a dirty old man ... was felt up by them a lot when I was a teen, though ;)

Unknown said...

I've had the "oh crap, I feel old" a few times in the past year, this is from turning 18, I dnt feel like I should have reached it yet.

May I suggest you try reflex, I'm not a fan of it there but maybe u and ur mates would like the 80s theme

Silicon Limey said...

Had one of those moments recently when I went out on a date and the girl I'd asked out turned out to be 23.

I'm 39, so legally old enough to be her dad. Suddenly felt very dirty, and not in a good way.

It was also kind of a sticky situation, because you can't really say "My goodness, I thought you were nearly a decade older" without causing great offence.

Anonymous said...

My friend pointed out the worst of it recently when I turned 30 he said "the soul crushing thing isn't when 18 year old girls look at you like you're a dirty old man its when they look straight at you and don't even see you"

auntiegwen said...

I'll make you feel much better sweetie

I'm even older !